Company

Our daughter, her special friend and his puppy dog came to visit. Gronk is 15 weeks old but a big baby. We got to babysit for him while they went to the UMM graduation. Amity received the young alumnus of the year award for her innovative work with children.

We went the night before to a meal for the honorees and their family and friends. Going the next day was out of the question as I was over the top exhausted and couldn't take another drive to Machias. So Sunday meant a long morning nap and a longer afternoon nap.
Rain today has given notice to all the other places that pain resides! Another take it easy day.
It has been a joy to have the "kids" here. Her special friend is low key and delightful. He also suffers from a similar disease and having someone who understands is great!

Exhaustion

Once again a wonderful day is followed by a day of unrelenting fatigue. I do so many things I wanted to do yesterday and felt really good about it. Today, not so much. Just keeping going has been very difficult. I did finally give in and rest for a couple of hours but I'd certainly like to lie down now and call it good!
Supper is next and then I will go to bed. I know a good night's rest will really help.  My rroomba is helping today. I have her working on the front room!

Up and Down

I had a wonderful visit from one of my middle daughters late Saturday and Sunday morning. She brought steaks and we had a wonderful cookout. Sunday morning my husband made us a delicious breakfast. We had a good visit and I enjoyed having my granddaughter here as well. I was overtired Sunday morning so I laid on the couch for the visit. When they left we finished the yummy strawberry pie my daughter had brought and I rested some more.
This morning I woke up with a painful body and an upset stomach. It never went away until supper time. Because my husband worked from home I was able to rest most of the day. 

Warm Days

I love the warm days of spring in summer. It's not too warm but a comforting warm in and out of the house.
 I am ignoring the headache that has hovered for a couple of days. I'm pretty sure it is pollen related. My body is tired on this luscious May day. I don't want it to be tired but it is. So I have mostly taken the day on the sidelines.
Watching out my window, listening from my chair. I saw the first hummingbird of the year try to get food from the red finch feeder. It got me up to locate the hummingbird feeder and fill it and put it up. I heard the Siamese talking out on the screen porch and got up to discover it was the feral half Siamese male as he raced by me and out the door. I suspect our Smudge could be in heat. I visited with a friend and encouraged another friend.
The almost constant dull chest pain has hung in there for several days. I try not to attend to it so much. It is better to focus on other things.
My husband has had a long day away from the house and I am looking forward to his return and supper and conversation and rest.

Faulty Thinking

Monday I did all the "right" things that should have brought to the end of the day ready to watch an episode and ease into rest for the night mode. NOT! My broken body thought that random severe pain would be a nice diversion from the quietness of the day. My tailbone was on fire. The inner part of my hipbone hurt and sent sharp pain down my leg into my foot. My chestwall which had hurt all day hurt more when we got to laughing about the antics of our kitty. By the time it was lights out, that last kiss before slumber my body was in rebellion and I was a wreck. I finally managed to get the pain manageable by adding more pain and anxiety meds (which I HATE to do) and fell asleep. I was happy to wake up with just dull pain.
Consequently any plans for Tuesday were out the window. My body had battled all night and I need to give it a break. Husband worked from home and that help, knowing he was nearby if things got wonky again. The only glitch was when I laid down to rest after lunch with soothing music my brain began racing and depression flooded me. After crying for way too long I went to my husband and he immediately helped me see the wisdom of more pain and anxiety help.
This morning I feel okay right now but know in my being that I live with random pain and its not my fault but I need to not be afraid of getting the help since I have the help close by and nobody thinks I should be stingy taking it when I need it.

Now Its Hot

The weather has changed completely and we have had a summer like day today. The snow along the treeline quickly disappearing.  I had a hard day yesterday with the high pollen closing down my airways. Today I did much better and kept low key in what I did. This is the time of year my hypersensitive airways react the most and give me many days of needing my inhaler and lots of rest.  I do not enjoy gasping for air and I try to keep ahead of the problem. Today I didn't get as much done as I thought I would but what I did was adequate.  I made supper and dessert. There is enough left over for two more meals that will go in the freezer and Paul should have dessert all week. 

Change

It has been an interesting week. I had a nice visit from my sister on Monday and she brought me a beautiful shell from my other sister's beach (well not really her's) in NC.  I love it.

My experiment with using all the meds as prescribed went south late in the week and I crashed feeling like a zombie! I was distraught and scared. I stopped the noon meds immediately and cut back on some that are PRN. I had no pain with the regular dosing but I also had no life. I would gladly endure pain! So I am back to pain in the morning in random places and pain here and there all day. I need to relax about this and get on with my life. Spring is here and there is so much opportunity to get outside and enjoy.

My hope is for the house to sell and for us to take the next step.
In God's time. In God's time!

Purple finch at the feeder.